short update

The semester final examination is around the corner. This friday will be my 1st paper-Pendidikan Moral, a mcq paper, sounds easy right but the I scored not good in my midterm. It is quite annoying paper too! The questions are confusing us whether which answer to choose. FML. Seriously, I dun like mcq paper because I hate in making choice!!!! I have 3 papers in this fcking short semester. Sooner, my holiday will start and the time I get bored and crazing. Crazing of being boring..Hate it !!


I am having my study week now. But it seems I dint study much. Everyday just Fb-ing, gamesss! I fall in love with Bejeweled Blitz and I fall in love in another phone game!!! [Snake Revol] I like it soooo much you know, I keep playing the game even before I go to bed..LOL 

Club

Finally, all the assignments submitted and mid-term exams ended! After been through the busy days for several weeks NON-STOP I am temporary FREE now!!! Yuhooo~ Last wed and thur I went to club with pei pei. Two days subsequently rock the night. HAHA..


1st: Our place-Quattro, it seems bored nowadays. No much people been there even though is Ladies' Night. Yet, had lotsa fun last night, I was tipsy and drunk.. There is some pictures of us ~

We were so BLUEeeeee!!

2nd: Maison, used to be there last "decade", I feel hateful of this club becuz alot of "seafoods" like to club at there. Again, with pei pei and some new frens rock the night ! But, I dint play to max this time, just feel kinda boring and I was feeling not so well as the last night was drink alot and vomit. :p Oh ya, I met up with EricTee last night. It has been quite long time I dint see him edi. He is getting fatter and the tummy... Somemore, another tummy guy, Isaac.. LOL

Mont Kiara

Location: 

Mont Kiara Solaris

Yea..I had some memorable time with some frens last weekend!!

(:

Heart Broken

Heart broken!

Yes, I am!

How broken am I when I saw their photos.

He has gf ediiiiiiiiiiiii..

FML

I just saw his picture in fb. He has gf already, and is the girl who I reckon last time!! Got lil bit can't accept the truth..LOL..Again, I wanna say : Praying hard both of you faster break up! FML

here is a very touching song..love it ♥ 

Big shit

I m lack of sleep for several weeks already!! My face like shit now, the black eyes circle more and more seriously like I was born with it.. FML

Study life = working life

All is sux !!

My body become so weak and unhealthy now..

I think I m going to die very soonnnn..

><

shit look

Life Insecurity

wondering it takes how long for me to endure the mental suffering !
I nvr recover fully!
stuck in breathing, how suffer it is no one would know about it
freak feeling..

RECENTLY

I was mostly die just now. The socket in my room was exploded while I am trying to pull the wire and what a luckily I dint touch it my hand!! The socket exploded followed with a loud explosion sound. I was stunned for few second you know. I saw the spark right in front my eyes! The whole socket bcum dark in colour now.What a luckily I am or else I might lying on the hospital bed now or even die already. Thanks God I am still alive! SWT!!

*Please, everyone be caution while you guy using electricity!!!! 

Another thing I wanna blog today is about my new sem! This is a short sem, every week only have 4 days classes which means that I can go back Klang on Thur. Sound good right but..... 

I can not go party so often le. No more Lady's Night!

FML!!!

There is only 4 subjects in this sem, only 3 of them have final exams. But, it still seems stressful for me. 

FML!

I hate study right now! How wish I can graduate now and get a job outside. I rather working than study. Maybe you will say that when you come to working life I will say I hate working. But, what I can tell you is I prefer working than study. I have an ambition,dream and goals. What I want only when I come to work only can achieve. I pursue those dreams which you all might not agree with me. But, there is no way for me to do better other than pursuing those dreams. All because I want to prove prove prove to YOU YOU YOU to see!! 

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人与时间赛跑

人总是失败者; 

而时间永远是赢家。

这也是个大家无可争论的事实

我 总爱与时间赛跑

怎么比 我还是输了

眼看  那天越来越遥远了

越来越遥远... 

怎么办好呢？

我好想好想当这场比赛的大赢家

我好想回到记忆里的那一天

记忆里 那有如小鹿乱撞的我..

看着你那有点双下巴的脸颊

你的笑容..

那海风轻轻地吹着

时而又刮起大风

把我们俩的头发吹得有点林乱

记忆里的一草一木，你的一举一动

还深深的记得

常常会想起当日的场景

好怕哪天  那美好的回忆会逐渐的消失，

而你那张脸孔逐渐变的模糊了

我好想把那回忆锁在我脑海里

时而可把它拿出来  回忆回忆一下

因为我知道  我们只是朋友

MELAKA ♥

Hello~ I just came back from MELAKA♥ 

I was not so enjoy for the trip actually because I have been there for many times since I was in primary school. Everything seems not so interesting and FRESH for me anymore. HAHA! I just follow the group.

As usual, we visited those famous tourist places and the foods there. We din't eat much of famous food there though just Satay Celup, Cendol, Chicken rice balls and etc. The main, the most memorable and the FRESH  place I wanna blog about this time THE JETTY!!!! hehe 

I am so excited to tell you all about this! I got myself to fall in love with this place SO MUCH as well as him too..:p

He was promised me that he will bring me go around Melaka when I come to Melaka. I was so exciting for the day to coming you know. And I prepared a birthday present for him as well since his birthday just passed. It was a chocolate actually because I have no idea what should I buy for him. The night was so unforgettable and meaningful for me. I felt so enjoyable for it because he is the person who you admire for so long time. We were chit-chatted all the night and had some beers.......................

ok, I am still exciting now..lol

Although everything seems impossible but never mind.I would keep all the pictures and the moment deep bottom my heart

[will blog more again about this trip later]

Miss..

miss

有时候真的很怀念小时候的我，

单单纯纯 的，

多好，没有要求。。

生活简单

人越来越大， 理想高了，要求多了。。

生活变得复杂

这样一来， 我变得很不开心

烦恼很多。。

有时候真的很想哭，更想这一睡  我再也不醒

有时候在想 

是这世界太复杂 还是我把它想得复杂呢？

心 真的很累 很痛。。

我多么的想你  你知道吗？

我多么的想再一次见到你  你知道吗？

我真的很想亲口跟你说  “I MISS YOU SO MUCH” !!!!

我不知道为什么我不能把你给忘了

我真的很想很想再牵你的手

我很怀念我们一起看电影，一起看horror movie, 然后你躲在我后面  跟我说你很害怕看horror movie..

我很怀念我们一起喝红酒，边喝边谈天

我真的很怀念

我还很怀念我们一起去吃雪糕

baby 我真的很想你  你知道吗？

还有很多很多   很多很多跟你在一起的时光

真的

那一次告别 却是我一生的遗憾  你知道吗？

我真的很想很想很想很想回到那一天

我不知道我做错了什么

B.L I m truly madly deeply missing you dear..

It's almost 3 am and I just washed up. I am tired but I want to write something here. Seriously and obviously, my problems never been solved! I feel like my life is so fuck up! I m sad I m sad I m sad!
I m feel so guilty guilty guilty!!!! What else can I do again?! No one can understand my feeling, the fucking thg stuck deep bottom of my heart!

Sick of the day which will never ever come back

Your tender, your romantic, your touch, your hug and your kiss....

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Till now, I remember every single things you did for me even though it was just a short period of time we have been together. 

I miss you, B.L....

I remember still how we got to know each other. Every single pieces of memory. Although, you are the one who hurt me but I still miss you! 

Sometimes, I feel so regretful to myself for not telling you that " I love you too".. These 4 words, forever and ever be my most regrettable words in my life. If I could ever go back to that day, I will tell you that "I love you" and kiss you passionately. 

Sometimes, I am so sick of the day which will never ever come back again ...

I miss you, B.L ...

♥

Live to play, Live to study and I need money to live

It has been a long long time I m dead. I was seeking for what I actually wanted to. Finally, I found this answer in my mind~ "live to play, live to study and I need money to live." 


"Live to play" because I love to play whenever and wherever I am. I love party simply for no reason. I can alive simply when I am in party. I can feel that I am the happiest person in the world when I am in the party. (I know it sounds like I am playful girl) hehe

"Live to study" because I am still a student right now. I can't run away from studying. I still have to concentrate in my study while I play around. How playful am I, I still will get myself back to the table for study. This is what kind of my life right now. I dun like study though but I still can't run away from it. When I start my working life, then I will "live to work" !! XD

Lastly, I need money. I love money so much. I love anyone else who are wealthy. It is undeniable that I love money so much. 

要原諒這個世界和自己。 要告訴自己，我值得擁有最好的一切。

如果你已經20歲了，你真的輸不起了，別再孩子了.....
如果你到了20歲，還沒到25歲 。 ——李開復


這篇文章是一把刀。看得人心疼，看得人心痛。

如果你已經過了20歲但還不到25歲的話，你必須找到除了愛情之外，能夠使你用雙腳堅強
站在大地上的東西。你要找到謀生的方式。現在考慮不晚了。

我從來不以為學歷有什麼重要，天才都不是科班，但，不是科班，連龍套都跑不了。

你必須把那些浮如飄絮的思緒，漸漸轉化為清晰的思路和簡單的文字。
華麗和漂浮都不易長久。你要知道，給予文字閱讀快感不夠的，
內容，思想，境界，靈魂，精神和智慧，這些才重要。
不要多看那些和你一個路數的女作家的文字。不要瑣碎，無病呻吟。
不要想到什麼就寫。不要流連於小感傷和小感動。

我要你相信溫暖，美好，信任，尊嚴，堅強這些老掉牙的字眼。
我不要你頹廢，空虛，迷茫，糟踐自己，傷害別人。
我不要你把自己處理得一團糟。
節制自己的感情並且珍惜它，明白這種感情不是任何人都能要。

千萬不要認同那些偽裝的酷和另類。
他們是無事可做的人找出來放任自己無事可做的藉口，真正的酷是在內心。
你要有強大的內心。


要有任憑時間流逝，不會磨折和屈服的信念。
不是因為在學校的象牙塔中，才說出我愛世界這樣的話，
是知道外面的黑，髒，醜陋之後，還要說出這樣的話。


好好去愛，去生活。青春如此短暫，不要歎老。
偶爾可以停下來休息，但是別蹲下來張望。
走了一條路的時候，記得別回頭看。時不時問問自己，自己在幹嘛?
傷心和委屈的時候，要嚎啕大哭。哭完洗完臉，拍拍自己的臉，擠出一個微笑給自己看。
不要揉，否則第二天早上會眼睛腫。

給自己一個遠大的前程和目標。記得常常仰望天空。記住仰望天空的時候也看看腳下。
任何時候，任何人問你，有過多少次戀愛，答案是兩次。
一次是他愛我，我不愛他。一次是我愛他，他不愛我。
好的愛情永遠在下一次。別給同一個人兩次傷害你的機會。

不要與浪子，文藝青年交往，別和沒心沒肺的人在一起，別和沒有正當職業混日子的人在
一起。別把犯賤當真愛。一個人作踐自己來取悅你的時候，千萬不要因此感動。
一個男人的煙頭燙在他身上，下一個就可能燙在你身上。
同樣的，當這個女人的刀片割斷她的手腕，下次就可能割斷你的。

千萬別相信一個不準備將你介紹給他的朋友圈子的男人。
一個女人只肯喊你“寶貝”的時候，堅持要她喊你的名字，因為你是男人。
一個男人或者女人不再來找你的時候，就不要再去找他或者她。
不要相信在戀愛上用手段的人。分手時不要口出惡言。
吸取教訓，但不要後悔。後悔沒有用。

別去做撕照片，燒信，撕日記這樣一類三流愛情電視劇中才有人幹的事。
相信愛情。相信好男人和好女人還存在，還未婚，還在茫茫人海中尋覓你。
別說“男人(或者女人)沒一個好東西”，這樣使別人誤以為你閱人無數。

愛物質，適當地。永遠知道精神更重要。
比起那些名錶，名牌，時裝，更加美麗的是勤奮而有朝氣的你自己。
如果你20歲以後所花的每一分錢還都是伸手向父母親人要來的，那你的滿身名牌就只能襯
托出你的無恥。別以為穿上名牌你就有品位，要知道如果沒有真正的內涵，騾子配上金鞍
也不會變成駿馬。
你還年輕，先不說開始你的事業，開創你的未來，但你已經成年，至少也要讓自己不再成
為父母的負擔，讓父母看到20年辛苦養育的希望。

無所事事只會把你變成一個廢物，一個被所有其他人鄙夷的廢物，因為這樣的你是一個不
折不扣的寄生蟲。
別以為弄個怪異的髮型，穿上不男不女的衣服，噴上刺鼻的香水，別人就會注重你，
要明白那樣招來的眼光就是別人在看一隻與眾不同的猴子。
許多有教養的人對另類的你的反感並不寫在臉上，但這種反感確鑿無疑肯定會給你帶來極
其不利的後果。

別瞧不起勞動人民。不要為勞動羞恥。土地不髒，汗味不難聞。
請尊重那些似乎生活狀況不如你，但仍然用自己的雙手誠實勞動養家糊口的人，因為這樣
才是尊重自己。永遠體恤那些生活在底層的人們，因為我們的親人就是在這些人群中。
我們不嬌貴。我們必須能夠自己養活自己，這是你的尊嚴所在。

不要小看一分錢。不妨自己去掙掙看。做人有時要強悍一點，被欺負的時候，一定要討回
來！但是不要記恨。小人之見，隨他們去好了。有原則的寬容和憐憫，會使你高貴。
有小心機的女生是可愛的，但別把這種心計用在勾心鬥角上，那樣會很累。
做人不要太高調，高調容易招惹是非。
但也不能太低調，該強悍時則強悍，但切不可咄咄逼人。


被朋友傷害了的時候，別懷疑友情，但提防背叛你的人。原諒，但並不遺忘。
做人存幾分天真童心，對朋友保持一些俠義之情。要快樂，要開朗，要堅韌，要溫暖。
這和性格無關。但你要忠誠，勤奮，要真誠的尊重別人，這樣你的人生才不會黑暗。

寬待自己，也寬待別人。當你不會因為小小的不如意小小的事而生氣或難過的時候，
你會輕鬆很多。

要原諒這個世界和自己。
要告訴自己，我值得擁有最好的一切。

You are the one who can make me smile 

I dint hope for anything I just hope that I can receive a simple reply msg from you..

Oh, that is more than enough!!

   ♥

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Guess what?

I m falling in love with some one else!!

He is someone I have been looking for so long.

He is so special for me simply for no reason. hehe

I will explore all the possibilities with enthusiasm. 

=D

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ 

终于， 我得到我要的答案！

我看到的，经历过的也许比我身边同年的朋友多，

当然，

我受的伤也多，严重，痛

两年内， 被伤 超过5次。

我是个打不死的蟑螂。。

也许伱说得对， 有一天他们会对我刮目相看， 我不再是你们眼里任人欺凌的女生！！

在那一天的到来， 我会事前做好准备。。

我并不是不想报复， 只是时机没到！

到时后 看谁怕谁。。

在我成功的那一天， 我会让全世界被情伤过的女生知道和那些贱男人知道

我们这些女生不是好欺负的！！

I am lost!
Could anyone help me?
I can't give me an answer for the questions!
I am falling deep into the bottom..heart broken into thousand of pieces..I am in pain.
I feel like my life will go on with this kind of disturbance..It will never come to the end.
I am so scared..so scared
I scared being hurt again and again
Hurt seriously than before, I cant take it anymore!
I pray very hard..but God like never lend me a hand..It keep hurting me again and again!
Who else can help me anymore?
Please ..please dun hurt me ..I please you with my pure heart.
P P P Please ...!
I am hurt and painful enough.
All the sins I deserved are more than enough!
Please give me a way out


With my pure heart I pray, I want a peaceful life, that all !!!

20th birthday

I gonna update a bit about my 20th birthday..

1. my birthday has officially over. That is nothing special of my birthday compared to years before. Just got different people was celebrating for me.

2. thanks to Edward for my birthday celebration. Thanks for the dinner at The Ship ;) and thanks for bringing me to Genting. Thanks for giving me a not loneliness birthday. Appreciate it ! 

3. Thanks for the surprises you all gave me as well as the cake. 

4. Thanks for the wishes and greetings from my friends in sms and facebook. 

5. Thanks for you all so that I m not feel lonely for my 20th birthday. Though it was not a blast one but I appreciate it a lot. 

Now, I am officially 20 yrs old! Not longer a minor edi~

I promise I will work hard for my study.

I promise I will not staying foolish as what I was.

I promise I will love myself as anyone will do!!

I will make my life full of colors, happier than years before !

Till then..... ♥

Lost

I think I will probably lost control once again !!

Kill me please! 

Please do allow me to hurt myself !

Sorry to everyone of you who really care for me !

Is you youyou!!!

Is you all made me wanna stay in the club !!

Is you all made me lost my direction !!

F**k off !

My life is full of f**king bloody bad memories are all caused by you all! 

F**king people, can't u just stay away from my life?

Can't you just f**k off yourself to the deep inside of the jungle and never come out ! 

<!@#$**!!?!@> 

!!!!

I have few things to blog right now.

1st,

I suddenly feel that why I can be so bad taste!! yucks!!

I just saw my ex-bf's pic from his fb.

I m wondering how could I able to get with this kind of guy?!! 

HE is f**king ugly man! shameful to tell people that he was my bf. 

GOSH!!WTH!! WTF!!

OMGGGGGGGGGG..

2nd, 

I wan to declare and swear that : 

" I will stop to go club" for TEMPORARY !!! ^^

I have been club almost every weeks regardless whether I have classes in next morning or not. I have only sleep for several hours when I go to club. Sleep late everyday. My big eyes circles are superb serious now! My skin are dry. I look like a sick person you know. I m mad already!! 

PENNY WONG PLEASE WAKE UP!! 

I hate my f**king "healthy life" right now!!

I MUST get rid of such bad habits. 

I m sad my life gone bad, my attitude gone bad, healthy gone!!

=(

DAMN YOU!

I think it was too much of entertainment here. Everything just about PLAY, CLUB, DRAMA! I think it is a bit too over. Sigh! Assignments and homeworks never complete. What the shit I am doing nowadays. I been club so often and even 2days continuously clubbing. Party everyday (Thumb upppp*) 

>__<

My life was really sick and shit recently! I was love and hate such kind of life. LOL

Some thing that remains and never find out a solution. It's truly affect my life seriously. 

What to do? 

Could you please give me some hints?

Want to tell you how I feel...

 "I'm missing you

I want to get with you "

but, I do not have courage to tell the truth !

Problems are never been solved !!

I came back to my sweet home again. 

I have a lot of homeworks to do!!! Assignments are burdening too. Ishhh! And next week will have my 1st small test of Business Accounting. It just 3rd week you know! It is freaking tough and totally drive me crazy. Gosh! I not really understand what she was teaching about because her speed like airplane, seem like she wanna end the class earlier. z z z Z ~

I am quite stressful actually beside vexing about all my homeworks and assignments. Some torturing and complexity of relationship problems still there. I am trying not to emphasize all those things in my life now but sometimes I can't fight for it. Sometimes, I feel so empty, nothing seems like now...seems nothing is important for me right now. I just want to stop thinking about everything, it's truly tiring! 

Waiting for someone's response but it seems like hopeless 

:(

so fcked up ! sometimes i wish i can go to sleep and never wake up.

Move to Sg. Long

Last Friday, I moved my stuffs from Wangsa to Sg.Long finally !!

Thanks to Sky and my bestie, Yoice for helping me , APPRECIATE !!

And, tomorrow will start my Uni life! 1st day study at UTAR , hurray 

But, I'm not willing to move out from here!! I love here, Metroview >.<

Anyway, I have to move to another new and stranger place~~

gonna staying there for about 2 years ++


Hope everything will go smoothly in uni life
gambateh!!!!!!

. . . .

Can anyone tell me what should I do now? 

Give me some hints, please ?

Money? Life? Peace?

I start to feel that the stress is approaching me. I'm so afraid of the bloody stressful matter I going to face it after this month. Stresses on my academies, friends, family, love, money and myself. How am I going to take it ?? I feel like I'm going to lose myself again. Sometimes, I feel so helpless because even me myself also can't cope it. 

Now, I finished my diploma and going to continue my degree at UTAR, Sg.long. I know I will face a lot of financial problem very soon. That's why I keep looking for part time job to earn extra pocket money. Last Sunday, I went for an interview for promoting liquor. And I know this not a proper job and I will be facing some transportation problem because the public transport is far away from my house. It is quite inconvenient sometimes and unsafe because the security there not so well. What to do? I must complete my study at this level!! 

Besides, I'm thinking of you everyday. Dreaming of you. I am wondering are you my bf? Uncertainty made me worry this and that! I'm trying to sms you twice but I worry I will disturb your work. You gave me an answer but I do not know when you are free to find me. Seriously, I do not know what I want right now! Money? Life? Peace? 

Life are full of choice yet it's confusing. 

I'm missing u truly, deeply, madly !

♥

May God bless me ! 

I pray every single day to have a normal life as normal people have. I need a normal life style with a normal life partner, that's enough for me! Past incidents had made my mood went up and down. Could you please give me a better one? Just a 'better' one not the best of the world ! 

REDANG ISLAND ♥

Finally, I update my Redang trip    ^ ^

It was a 3days 2nights trips, I do hope I can stay longer at the island,haha!! I love the beach, a place where I can be alone in the bright sunlight, a place where I can sit and listen to the waves of water crashing a long the shore. We stayed at Redang Holiday Beach Villa, which are located on the long beach, cozily at the edge of lagoon. The resort has built overlooking the bay with crystal clear blue seawater, being built on the boulders against backdrop of the hillside and fronting the beach at Redang Island. It sounds great right? haha! Seriously, I was being inspiring by the white sands, blue sky and the sea !! 

 ♥

Hmm, actually I dint enjoy to play on the beach on the first day because I lacked of sleep last night ! My friends fetched me after I back from working last night and I dint sleep well in the car. They were too noisy, haha! Plus, there were drizzling in the early morning when we reached the jetty. I got minor headache due to this. Then, I rest in the resort. I slept for whole afternoon,gosh! When night came, we were strolling on the beach after our dinner. Ohya, I love the beach party !! We dance like no one business on the beach,haha!! And, I met with JW at Redang Island, he came with his gf and friends. 

♥

The next morning, we went for snorkelling. I was worrying about my safety for this activity initially because I dun know how to swim one. But, luckily, my friend was beside me and encouraging me and teaching me non-stop. At last, I able to do it. I can float on the SEA !! yeah!~ LOL

Thanks a lot to him for non-stopping teaching me this and that; taking good care everything for me and paid for me for the whole trip spending so that I have an memorable and unforgettable Redang tirp.

THANKS !!!

*hug*

I love the snorkelling the most throughout the trip.This because I can see the actually view of  undersea, the coral reefs, the fishes and some other marine organisms which I unable to spell it out..haha!!Even though, under the cruelly bloody hot sun, my lovely skin are being basked like hell yet it is worth it !!!!!!

Same as last night, we went to the beach party. I like the party too beside the snorelling. I met with two China girls. One called 王蕾another I dun remember edi.haha!!

But, this time, my foot was bruise and bleeding because someone has stepped on my foot accidentally 

=(

Have a great night again.

♥

Good thing comes very fast yet it flips away so quickly too. The 3rd day of the trip and it also the last day I stay on the Redang Island. I were so unwilling to leave the beautiful and memorable beach where I enjoyed the most ! *sad* 

I packed my luggage and went to brunch. After that, we had take some photos on the beautiful beach. Too bad, it was raining again !! We waited for our ship. All of us get wet again. 

zzzzz!

About some time, we reach the jetty yet still raining. I bought some souvenirs then we headed to Kemaman. My friend brought us for lunch. We had some otak-otak and some famous food in Kemaman. After the lunch, we went back to kl. 

I was tired yet enjoyable ~

It is a wonderful beach I ever seen !

Hope I can be there again in another time!